The Attachment Theory of Relationships

“Touch is the most basic way of connecting with another human being. Taking your partner’s hand when she is nervous or touching his shoulder in the middle of an argument can instantly defuse anxiety and anger.

The world of therapy has been obsessed with maintaining boundaries in recent years. I say our problem is just the opposite—we’re all cut off from each other.

If you watch two people in love, they touch each other all the time. If you watch two people finding their way back into a love relationship, after falling into demon dialogues, they touch each other more, too. They literally reach for each other; it’s a tangible sign of their desire for connection.”

—Sue Johnson, “Hold Me Tight.” Psychology Today. January 2009.

Useful quick overview that made me want to read her book, “Hold Me Tight: Your Guide to the Most Successful Approach to Building Loving Relationships.”

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