A Sport of Their Own

“‘Wrestling gives you what you need to be successful,’ Kretzer explained. ‘It gives you dedication, commitment. It gives you somewhere where you belong. You can be your own self and be a total badass…

‘Wrestling allows you to find yourself. With your wins and losses, you get to reflect and try to develop yourself into something better. It’s not something you practice a few hours; it’s a 24/7, full commitment. The struggles in wrestling help you with the struggles outside of wrestling.'”

—Liz Clarke, “A Sport of Their Own.” The Washington Post. November 8, 2019.

I fully support wrestling as a sport for girls. Wrestling changed my life, and everyone should have that opportunity.

Huey P. Newton Gun Club

“Our mission is to aspire to educate and arm black people in the U.S. and abroad. We realize this is an international struggle against capitalism and imperialism. We also are in solidarity with poor people around the world and understand the similarities we deal with.”

Huey P. Newton Gun Club

The true test for believers in gun rights: should groups you don’t belong to, e.g., minorities, the poor, the marginalized, etc., have guns? If you don’t want people armed who are poor, black and homeless, perhaps you don’t believe in gun rights, but something else?

Ask Molly: Manic Pixie Mean Girl

“Enough of stating the fucking obvious, though. Let’s talk about how we’re going to survive the next year of bloviating sexist fuckwaddery. Let’s talk about what it means not just to survive, not just to escape predation and tolerate douche bro-viating and tune out all of the ignorant dipshit-itude, but to savor life and embrace joy as a woman or a girl or a enlightened human of any gender in this ludicrously insipid, unseeing, witless world.”

-Heather Havrilesky, “Manic Pixie Mean Girl.” Ask Molly. November 8, 2019.

I love Ask Molly. Everything about it.

Thank You For Your Service

“Almost half of U.S. veterans and active service members feel uncomfortable with being thanked for their service, a new survey has revealed…

…The poll found that instead of saying the simple thank you, most veterans and service members preferred gratitude that went beyond simple platitudes and that tried to connect with them on a more personal level.”

—Tareq Haddad, “Veterans ‘Uncomfortable’ With ‘Thank You for Your Service,’ Ask for More Civilian Support This Veterans Day.” Newsweek. November 9, 2019.

Deeply uncomfortable with, “Thank you for your service.” In my experience, it is said by people that generally don’t know what that service entails and have naive notions that the U.S. military is promoting “freedom” around the world and is maintaining it at home. “Thank you” is often a performance, where the individual is erased in the service of a national mythology. It’s best not to ask what was done and how it effected the people who did it and the folks on the receiving end because it might be horrible.

Exhibit A of the kinds of damage done by false praise mentioned this morning.

False Praise

Open Question: Why is false praise seen as so much less harmful than false criticism?

“Presumably the reason we now allow suits for false defamation is that we see a net social harm there; others are liable to be misled, causing misallocations of resources and relations. In addition, resources may be wasted in back-and-forth defamation battles. But it seems to me that we should also expect similar social harms to result from false positive comments, not just false negative comments. So maybe we should consider having law discourage those as well.”

-Robin Hanson, “Why Not Also Punish False Praise?OvercomingBias.com. October 31, 2019.

The Asshole Filter

“If you find yourself wondering, or just feeling, “Why is everyone I wind up dealing with an asshole?” you might want to consider the possibility that you have set up an asshole filter. Asshole filters are an extremely common phenomenon, and an extremely common problem…

…An asshole filter is a situation one creates that causes non-assholes to reduce contact with you at a disproportionate rate (like at all) than assholes.

The simplest way to do this is to ask politely.

An asshole filter happens when you publicly promulgate a straitened contact boundary and then don’t enforce it; or worse, reward the people who transgress it.”

-siderea, “The Asshole Filter.” siderea.dreamwidth.org. September 15, 2015.