Trying is Lying

“‘I wish someone had told me when I was much younger that I didn’t have to have an airtight legal case for a breakup — all I had to have was a desire to no longer be in that relationship,’ she writes. ‘I would have saved myself a lot of time.'”

—Kelli María Korducki. “Leaving a Good Man Is Hard To Do.” Longreads.com. May 2018.

The test of every ethical choice is whether you’d want to be on the receiving end of it. Personally, I wouldn’t want to be with someone who no longer wanted to be in a relationship with me. So, I tend to think it is good advice.

But, at the same time, it would be real easy to use this way of thinking to cut and run every time a relationship gets hard, and every relationship worth having is going to get hard.

Joan Didion might have put it better in her essay on Self-Respect:

“…anything worth having has its price. People who respect themselves are willing to accept the risk that the Indians will be hostile, that the venture will go bankrupt, that the liaison may not turn out to be one in which every day is a holiday because you’re married to me.”

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