Weird episode of the day. I walk most places. I walk to the grocery store. It’s just over 2 miles from where I live. Because it is a ways, I bring my military sea bag, so I can carry all the groceries back home.

I’m walking away from the grocery store, and someone behind me starts yelling, “I can’t take it anymore. Give me a gun. It’s so hot. I hate it. I’m going to shoot myself in the head.” I’m used to cities. So, i tend to ignore weird outbursts, even if I’m currently in a small town of less than 100,000. But, a couple of thoughts did occur to me.

1. I wonder if the military-style sea bag served as a visual trigger. He seemed to be suggesting that he’d enlist or something.
2. If it is the heat, it was only like 90F. If your worst problem is that it’s hot at that level, you’re probably doing alright. Besides, buck-up. You only have to wait a month or two and things will change.
3. It reminded me of one of the military trainings I went through where they were fond of saying, “Mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it don’t matter.”
4. Was this some kind of performative effort? Are we so preoccupied with making a spectacle of ourselves that we declare that we are going to kill ourselves, over the heat, to get attention?

I don’t know what to make of it, on reflection. I discount that any of it is real, out of hand. Even if it were real, I’m not the person to help someone in that kind of crisis. But, I do worry that my whole environment is crying wolf all the time, and I’ve become desensitized to real cries of pain. However, I’m positive this one wasn’t one. But, what if the next one is and I no longer can even entertain the possibility it’s real?