https://twitter.com/henloitsjoyce/status/1955284509886386201 A recent tweet from a former AI companion company founder has been making rounds, describing how their product—an AI boyfriend named "Sam"—unexpectedly attracted more female users than their original AI girlfriend offerings. The thread offers a rare insider perspective on the mechanics of digital intimacy, detailing features like proxy phone numbers with ambient background … Continue reading The Atrophy of Connection: Why AI Companions Are More Dangerous Than Cognitive Prosthetics
Tag: relationships
When Kindness Needs Boundaries: Understanding Healthy Distance in Relationships
We're often told that being a good person means being open and welcoming to everyone. We hear phrases like "everyone belongs" and "we're all connected." These ideas are beautiful and true in an important way—every person has value and deserves to be treated with basic respect. But here's something that doesn't get talked about enough: … Continue reading When Kindness Needs Boundaries: Understanding Healthy Distance in Relationships
A Simple Guide to Relationship Zones
What This Is About Ever wonder why some relationships feel good and others feel terrible? Or why the same person can be great in one place but awful in another? This guide helps you figure out what's going on. The Three Types of Relationships Think of relationships like a traffic light with three colors: Red … Continue reading A Simple Guide to Relationship Zones
💞 Relationship Checklist
What this is:This is a simple tool to help you figure out whether a relationship feels healthy, respectful, and good for you. It could be about a friend, family member, coworker, or even someone you just met. Why it matters:Sometimes we get used to relationships that leave us feeling small, tired, or confused. This checklist … Continue reading 💞 Relationship Checklist
Principles of Interaction
Note: This essay is a work in progress, a way to think through some ideas I have about social interaction, reality testing, worldviews and what not. Introduction "Von Neumann would carry on a conversation with my 3-year-old son, and the two of them would talk as equals, and I sometimes wondered if he used the … Continue reading Principles of Interaction
Cutting Concepts: Status, Relationships, Society and Civilizations.
"Cultural evolution is about overcoming human nature. Or rather, it is about encouraging certain aspects of human nature and suppressing other aspects of human nature. Without civilization, humans tend to organize into small, slightly polygynous groups that fight each other over women and resources. Civilizations evolved because they could form bigger and more efficient armies … Continue reading Cutting Concepts: Status, Relationships, Society and Civilizations.
The Campsite Rule
“Tell no lies; make no outsize promises; transmit no infections. Ideally, everyone would leave everyone in better shape than when they found them.” —Dan Savage quoted in Lila Shapiro, "The Age Gappers." The Cut. December 20, 2023.
Brief Comments on Consensual Hostility
"Once consent becomes the only value by which an individual can assess sex to be good or bad and justify their assessment to their partner or anyone else, all that’s left of seduction is contract negotiation fueled by whatever mix of horniness and loneliness brought the two parties together. There’s an alternative. As Srinivasan herself … Continue reading Brief Comments on Consensual Hostility
The Five Love Languages
According to Gary Chapman, the five love languages are: words of affirmation (compliments) quality time receiving gifts acts of service physical touch This book, "The Five Love Languages," was published 30 years ago. I think it is a good mental model for thinking about relationships, and it probably helps to think of them as a spectrum. It's … Continue reading The Five Love Languages
Warmth: Charisma & Commitment
I've been thinking a bit about stolzyblog's comment on Coin of My Realm: Meaning post from a few days ago. Let me quote the exchange entirely: "SB: Warmth. It’s what is missing from Robin Hansen’s “insight”. And the interesting thing about this is it seems (from watching some of his interviews) that he does not … Continue reading Warmth: Charisma & Commitment
Our Technology Sickness—and How to Heal It
"Because of the digital revolution, our lives are being transformed by three grand bargains. The intellectual bargain: we have more knowledge but less capacity to concentrate and focus. The social bargain: we are much more available but much less attentive. And most importantly, the emotional bargain: we are much more connected, but much less empathetic. … Continue reading Our Technology Sickness—and How to Heal It
Happy People Tend to Stay That Way
* “[X], were you satisfied with your life before you met [Y]?”* “[X], were you free from depression before you met [Y]?”* “[X], did you have a positive affect before you met [Y]?”Researchers have found that people who answered “yes” to questions such as these are significantly more likely to report being happy in their … Continue reading Happy People Tend to Stay That Way
Behind Every Criticism is a Wish
No. 1 Rule: Keep Your Shit to Yourself
"A day before I sent Malcolm the email saying I wanted to break up, I came across a term online: solo polyamory. It described a person who is romantically involved with many people but is not seeking a committed relationship with anyone. What makes this different from casual dating is that they’re not looking for … Continue reading No. 1 Rule: Keep Your Shit to Yourself
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