Risk Defines Love

Love, true love, makes possible what was previously impossible.

“In this short film from the UK director William Williamson, [French philosopher Alain] Badiou argues that today’s approach to relationships, with its consumerist tendency to focus on choice and compatibility, and the ingrained refrain to move on when things aren’t easy, means that we need a philosophical reckoning with how we think about love. To make his point very specific, Badiou points to the ever-growing prevalence of online dating services that claim to offer algorithmic matching of partners, a way of seeking love that, he thinks, drains love of one of its most vital qualities – chance.”

—William Williamson, “‘Defend love as a real, risky adventure’ – philosopher Alain Badiou on modern romance.Aeon. March 6, 2020.

Neil Postman’s Advice on How to Live the Rest of Your Life

7. Establish as many regular routines as possible.
In order to position yourself well to cope with constant change, you should
establish as many predictable structures and routines as possible. The point is
to reduce the number of decisions you have to make about trivial matters. Save
your energy for major questions that arise in our technological society. Regularize the trivial to cope with the significant…

Nystrom’s Nugget #1
Reserve the word ‘friend’ for someone who knew you when you still wore
braces on your teeth, who has on at least one occasion spent the night with you
in a hospital emergency room or police station, and who will without hesitation
commit perjury for you in a court of law. Other people may rightly be called
‘acquaintances.’

13. Read’s Law: Do not trust any group larger than a squad, that is, about
a dozen.

All bureaucracies are alike, their principal characteristic being their wish to
satisfy the rules of the system. Bureaucracies are by nature hostile to individual
differences. Although we pretend institutions care, institutions do not have loyalty, compassion, or feelings, which are human traits…

16. Weingartner’s Law: 95% of everything is nonsense.
Do not allow yourself to become grim about anything. Above all, do not be-
come an ist: a socialist, a feminist, a capitalist, etc. This will help you avoid
hardenings of the categories and help you keep your sense of humor…

19. Divest yourself of your belief in the magical powers of numbers.
Quantification has a very limited effectiveness. Any attempt to apply quantifi-
cation to human affairs represents pure superstition of a medieval kind. Never-theless, modern America is based on counting. We try to redefine non-quantifiable concepts into objective quantities: for example, take the numerical scores given for intelligence tests or for contestants in beauty pageants. This passion for numbers and quantification must be discarded…

Nystrom’s Nugget #5
Do not place too high a value on honesty and plain speaking. You are not wise
enough to know what is the truth, and what seems plain to you may only bring
pain to others.

Postman’s Addendum to Nugget #5: Of all the virtues, the most overrated is
honesty. Honesty is the first refuge of the scoundrel. According to Irish writer
Oliver Goldsmith, the main use of language is to conceal your thoughts, not to
reveal them. In some sense, by suggesting that speaking your mind can be up-
setting, Nugget #5 offers an anti-ventilation theory.

-Janet Sternberg, “Neil Postman’s Advice on How to Live the Rest of Your Life.” Academia.edu. December 8, 2005

h/t Austin Kleon.

Champagne Wishes and Caviar Dreams

“I always want to say to people who want to be rich and famous: ‘try being rich first.’ See if that doesn’t cover most of it. There’s not much downside to being rich, other than paying taxes and having your relatives ask you for money. But when you become famous, you end up with a 24-hour job…”

-Bill Murray quoted in Tim Ferris, “11 Reasons Not to Become Famous (or “A Few Lessons Learned Since 2007”)“. tim.blog. February 2, 2020.

Lest you think suddenly becoming rich is going to “cover most of it”, try reading this Reddit chestnut, “You just won a 656 Million Dollar Lottery. What do you do now?” Still want to be rich?

The same applies to power. People tend to be preoccupied with attaining fame, riches or power. All of them are soul destroying if you achieve them in any significant measure.

Add Phone-Free Walking to Your Day

“Find a way to add phone-free walking to your daily schedule. Make it non-negotiable. Make it easy. Skip a bus ride from your house to the station. Get off a station earlier on the way to work. Use 30 minutes of your lunch break to walk to a far-off cafe. The important thing is to leave the phone off the body. It can be in a backpack, that’s fine. Keep it out of easy reach. Even better: keep it at home. I don’t know if the lightness will register for you, but it does for me. Phone, no phone, two entirely separate universes. Like starting the day with the internet on or off. A totally different quality of time and thinking. For me, the phone removed or reduced to a simple tool brings me back to the walks, and in being brought back to the walks I remember the floating consciousness, and from that, if I’m lucky, a dollop of grace.”

—Craig Mod, “Responses to SMSs Part 4.” Ridgeline. January 28, 2020.

Also, “all the best tricks to life seem to sound reductive and dumb when you say them out loud.”

Benefit from Other People’s Therapy

Some of my favorites from this thread:

Pace Yourself

Open Question: What does it mean to “pace yourself” in modern culture? Does it mean staying with something long enough, over time, to truly develop a relationship with the material and love it?

“There’s a willingness, there’s a faith, there’s a very, very magical alchemy that happens when somebody looks at something with enormous love and enormous passion—and it doesn’t matter what that material is. It can be a comic book page, it can be a silly story, and you don’t change it, but the way you look at it transforms it. Which is a very different exercise than postmodernism. Postmodernism or kitsch is me winking at you, saying ‘I know it’s silly, but I’m being ironic. I’m above the material.’ And for me, the transformative power of art is you are not above the material…

…I think it is amazing that I can travel with my iPad with thousands of movies. I think it is amazing that I can streamline thousands more. I think it is amazing that I can know what happened in far-flung countries, in one second. But it is up to us, as humans—one of our ethical tasks is to say, how am I going to pace myself? What am I focusing on? Because otherwise we live life in a blur. We’re texting and driving. So it is—media is not evil. The speed of media is not evil. What is toxic is that we don’t pace ourselves. That we’re not having dinner without texting; that we’re not capable of paying full attention to the moment we’re living. And that is true also of the cinematic discourse.”

-Guillermo del Toro in an interview with Lauren Wilford, “Death is the Curator: An Interview with Guillermo del Toro.” Bright Wall / Dark Room. Issue 44. February 2017.

This whole interview is packed with wisdom and might change the way you think about culture, particularly film. Read it.

The Fruit of the Moment

We are all here for our own reasons. Those reasons aren’t important. What is important is that we came and that our time together is short. Wring magic from these transient moments, while you can.

Fear being stuck more than falling, and falling more than the crocodile by the shore or the tiger in the jungle. In the end, it is often the difficulties that matter the most. Life will find you. Eventually, it finds us all. As will its opposite.

The meaning of life is that it ends. Being in this moment, balancing on the fulcrum between survival and the sublime, our lives are spent in the shin deep mud of necessity – slippery, slick and shifting – looking to pick fruit from the fertile field. No one comes out clean, but sometimes, we find something good to eat.

Relentlessly prune abstraction. Savor the fruit of this moment. It is all we have.

Roam

A note-taking tool for networked thought.As easy to use as a document. As powerful as a graph database. Roam helps you organize your research for the long haul.

Roam

I wanted to bookmark this for the future. I currently use org-mode in emacs for journaling and NextCloud Notes for a Keep replacement. But, this looks interesting.